


Oops!Hi

by MinnieLaceHaz



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band), One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Insecure Ashton, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Online Relationship, Self-Harm, Sweet Luke, Underage Kissing, they ship Larry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-07
Updated: 2015-10-08
Packaged: 2018-04-25 08:58:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4954309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MinnieLaceHaz/pseuds/MinnieLaceHaz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where Luke and Ashton both love One Direction, both ship Larry, and both think Louis tops. And somewhere between the fanboying, late night chats and calls, they fall in love at the words 'Oops' and 'Hi', just like Larry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> their relationship is started on Wattpad, just so you know.

Username: HazzasKitten707

Name: Larry's Love Child

Followers: 21.2K

Following: 96

Published Works: 7

About:

Heyy, fellow Larry Shippers <3 if you don't think Larry's real, please leave and get your eyes checked. And that's coming from a guy who wears glasses.

Before you Ask:

I'm a boy directioner, I'm 15, I'm depressed but somehow content, I am gay and not proud. Sad, but true. I love writing, I happen to love Harry Styles more than I should, but that's cool, you know? Cause, he's Harry and it's hard not to love that cupcake. 

I also ship Zerrie, cause they're awesome.

Harry's ass is flat cause Louis slams into him too hard sometimes. #LouisTopsBitchesDealWithit

I Love: The Summer Set, Simple Plan, All Time Low, Selena Gomez, Justin Bieber (if you hate, I'll stab you with my hard dickkk), Taylor Swift (idek, she's cool), Ariana Grande is my queen, Little Mix, Usher (? ikr), The Ready Set, Paramore, The Vamps, Panic! at the Disco, and plenty more that takes too much effort to type.

TV shows I like: (People still watch TV?) are Pretty Little Liars, Boy Meets World, and mainly cartoons if I actually even watch TV anymore.

YouTubers: Connor Franta, LushLaws, Jenna Marbles, and Jc Caylen. I used to love Our2ndLife, but since Connor left, I only watch Jc and Kian. I'm not big with YouTube, only them and Harry Styles Laughing videos along with One Direction funny moments, yes.

Favorite fanfic: Uniquely Perfect

I have never been to a concert, I doubt I will, but I would love to see One Direction on their On the Road Again tour. Anyways, love you guys, thanks for everything and keep smiling. (:

After changing his 'About' section, Ashton went back to updating his Larry story. It was about Harry getting pregnant, cause Wattpad is awesome and what-not. Occasionally, Ashton has a hard time actually focusing since he occasionally goes on YouTube or even does nothing, yet gets distracted.

Once he finished updating, he dedicated to a reader and scrolled through his newsfeed. A lot was basically people updating or liking stories he found boring or was already reading. The thing is, Ashton doesn't really have people who text him or want to hang out when school's over. Once it's 2:10, he has no friends and no social life aside from the internet.

Everyone says that, but for him it's true. He literally has friends online and that's it. Sure, at least he has online friends, however at times he feels as though it's not true and that they only talk to him because they like his stories. As much as he appreciates that, he just wanted an actually person who liked him for who he is and not what he writes.

He closed his laptop, laying on his bare bed and glanced around his empty room. It was his first day in his new house and he's procrastinating on unpacking. For the past three years, he lived in a hotel with his grandma, mum, step dad and his little Yorkie named Sassy. 

Maybe he named it after Louis, maybe.

Despite that, Ashton yawned and got up. He began opening a few boxes, unpacking and decided to hang up his posters the next day or something. He still goes to the same school, his bus stop was the one he went to before. The hotel he lived at was near his house and since he didn't have a car (family didn't either) he had to walk every morning. 

Now, he can sleep in and still stay up late. He grabbed his One Direction shirt, smiling and put it away. You see, Ashton is gay no doubt, but no one knows. Mainly because he had no one to tell, considering he doesn't have actual friends he can trust and he was worried about his family's thoughts on the subject.

Suddenly, the door opened and yeah, his mum never knows. She walked in, Sassy following like the cutie she was and barked in a high pitched sound, rolling around like a weirdo. Ashton's mum glanced around, raising an eyebrow,"Wow, I didn't think you would start unpacking."

"Yeah, you're always on your laptop," His stepdad grumbled, and Ashton could practically smell the weed on him. Maybe because he was smoking it with his drug-addict friends and constantly bringing it in the house. 

That's another reason he doesn't have friends, he never invites them over because he's worried they would smell the weed and tell people or ask about it. Honestly, he's embarrassed because of his family. They're all lazy, sleep in till noon and do drugs or drink like hell. The only good one is his grandma, but she works till eleven and he rarely see's her.

About what his step-dad said, it's true. Ashton is always online. And no, he doesn't mean it the way people say. He's literally on the computer if he's home and never leaves his room, even resorting to bringing snacks in and hiding them. If he even eats that day, because he tries not to since he's worried about getting fat a lot.

He groaned, whining,"Can you leave? I'm trying to unpack."

"Whatever, you're having macaroni for dinner," She said, patting her leg and whistled,"C'mon Sassy, daddy will take you out now. She must not be use to the new house."

Ashton rolled his eyes when his step-dad and mum left the room. Right when she was gone, he searched for his CD-player and put in his One Direction Midnight Memories CD. He skipped the first three, annoyed of constantly listening to them all the time and began jamming to it while unpacking.

His family new of his obsession, and he wasn't afraid to admit it. Honestly, it's worse to not admit when you're obsessed with something. It's being indenial, and he'd rather da Niall be in him. Yeah, he went there. He'd let any member of the band fuck him, but Louis wouldn't like that and neither would Perrie or Sophia. Luckily, Niall is free and the Irish are probably really good at fucking.

Once he was decently done, he finished putting his movie's in the bookcase he had. His room was small, only having a bookcase, bed and dresser. It disappointed him, but it's much better than being in a tiny hotel room with three people and druggies coming in and out all the time, hiding their weed despite being able to see it cause Ashton isn't stupid and knows what weed is.

He's fifteen, not five.

After a while, he laid in bed and took out his Lg Realm phone and mentally grimaced. It's not like he wanted a iPhone, since they break a lot and he's clumsy. But, sometimes he feels left out with emoji's and not being able to see them. Plus, everyone judges him when they take out their 'amazing' phones and he's stuck with that.

When he typed in his password, maybe it's Harry's birthday, he went to the Wattpad app. His background happened to be Harry with his polka dot over shirt and a bandana, he loves that picture. Seeing as he was bored and had no life, he began reading Uniquely Perfect for the millionth time.

The only thing that sucked was the author is now a Louis!bottom girl.

He never understood how people can switch like that. It's as if you're saying you're a Niall girl then went to Liam. It's impossible to switch, at least not after two or three years of believing in something. He actually cringes whenever trying to read a story and then Louis ends up bottoming. It doesn't work in his mind, even if Louis is 'smaller'.

As he reread it, he giggled at all the cute things Harry did and suddenly, while looking through the comments cause he liked seeing if people had the same reactions as him, he recognized a certain name. While reading stories, he tends to recognize a few people who read all the ones he did. And this person seems to read every story he does and happens to comment a lot on his own. The comment made him mentally nod in agreement.

PayneInMyLow:@suckmydizzlehazza seriously? Dude, I may be gay, but I don't flaunt around being a guy directioner for attention. I saw you comment this so many times. It doesn't make you special. stfu and just read the story, god. 

It was a couple days ago, but it brought his attention. Ashton hesitated, adding the book to his library so it saved his spot and clicked the guy's name. He went to the message button, then contemplated on what to say. Sometimes he feels awkwardly randomly chatting a person online, cause you can't just say hi, but you can't be stupid or else they'll mentally laugh at you. Finally, he just typed out a message.

HazzasKitten707: Heeyy, so like, I see you reading a lot of the stories I read and I saw your comment on Uniquely Perfect about flaunting being a guy directioner. I feel you, it's really stupid when guy's act like their awesome just cause they like a band and it's rare to find them. And you're gay? Me too :D I'm almost as gay as Harry, but no one can beat him in that catogory, not even Louis, lol. And Louis is so sassy and flamboyant, but lately Harry's beaten him by a mile, I mean, he wore pink panties one time. What a dorky XD oh god, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have rambled, oops!

HazzasKitten707: Ps, love the username ;) much better than mine, haha.

He mentally grimaced for being such an idiot and awkward person, instantly regretting that and tossed his phone to the side. It's times like these that he wonders what's it's like to be normal and not have to deal with embarrassing himself online over a app mainly filled with gay fanfiction.

Awesome fanfiction, if we're being serious here.

Seeing it was almost time to sleep, he grabbed pajamas and went to the bathroom to shower. Since his home is like an apartment, it's one story and there's people living underneath him, and across. Also, people are constantly coming in his house, so it's awkward to walk around in a towel since you can see his room from the living room.

Once he was done changing, he overheard his stepdad talking about blunts and what-not. It's a common thing to overhear, plus he heard his mum watching Dancing with the Stars, she watches it online since it's an American show. But, she loves it for some reason. 

When he got to his room, he laid down and went on his phone again, shocked when seeing the guy messaged him back despite the embarrassing message. He hesitated, but clicked the message and grinned when reading the response, surprised by what he said.

PayneInMyLow: Hi (; (see what I did there? I know, I rock) And yeah, guys like that piss me off. I try not to lash out on people, but it happens anyways. And yessss, Harry's so freaking gay, I don't understand why people think he's straight. Judging by what you said, I assume you're a haiy boy.

PayneInMyLow: I meant Harry* fuck you autocorrect XD

Ashton laughed silently, rolling his eyes. That's the downside of being a Harry boy or girl, it can sound weird and sometimes autocorrect assume you mean hairy. Like, who would admit to being hairy? He main not be the most hairless person, but he's having trouble hitting puberty at the moment.

Hazzaskitten707: Yes I am :D He's so cute and awesome, I would say he's extrodo-harry, but that's carroty apparently. I don't think it is, sometimes I cringe when people type it, but nothing's carroty in my mind. I think it's cute to think about the old 1D moments, you know? Anyhoo, who's your favorite? I'm guessing Liam....? Haha.

PayneInMyLow: Agreed, carroty should only be used if you can tell someone's a new fan, not because someone wants to relive a favorite moment or whatever. And of course, he's a sexy beast but somehow adorable. Like my username says, I want him to bring pain to a lower area....get it? hehe, I'm funny :3

Ashton shook his head in amusement, curling up in his blanket a bit and buried his face in his pillow. The guy so far seems amazing, he's funny and actually agrees with what Ashton thinks. Sometimes people agree and don't actually, he was hoping this wasn't those times.

HazzasKitten707: Hilarious...or should I say...hi-larry-us XD I'm funny too, ha! What's your favorite song?

PayneInMyLow: that's a hard choice :(

Hazzasktten707: okay, fine. Top 3 in each album, and deluxe/stufflikethat counts :)

It took a while for a response, so Ashton glanced at his TV and saw Fresh Prince of Bell Air was one. He grinned, loving Will Smith and finding him funny. He also loves Jaden, and would definitely date him if the kid was gay. He heard a beep and saw the guy responded.

PayneInMyLow: UAL would be Moments, Taken, and Gotta Be You cause I would love Liam to make a mess upon my innocence. TMH would be over again, they don't know about us (larrrryyyy), and....fuck...hmmm... Loved You First cause Louis loved harry first and still does. MM would be don't forget where you belong, half a heart and I would say Story of my life, but I've been annoyed of it, so probably Little White Lies. Your turn (:

HazzasKitten707: wow we're so alike, lol. I like Moments, I should've kissed you, and More than this. For TMH, I like she's not afraid, I would and I would say little things, but that's been annoying, so probably they don't know about us cause Larry ;) and for MM I think...through the dark, happily and don't forget where you belong <3 it's their first song not about a girl (harry/louis)

PayneInMyLow: I noticed that too, lol. I gotta go, I'm sorry :( wait, what's your name? if you don't mind me asking...

HazzasKitten707: Ashton, yours? 

PayneInMyLow: Mine's Luke :D goodnight Ashton, hope we can talk again. I can tolerate you :p

Ashton rolled his eyes, replying with a goodnight and put his phone down after setting his alarm. For some reason, as he laid down and got comfortable, Luke wouldn't leave his mind. He actually liked him, and not just his taste in music. He wanted to know him more, like his age and what he likes. 

It just so happened, that Luke was thinking the same thing.


	2. Chapter 2

Username: PayneInMyLow

Name: Luke Payne - Malik

Followers: 5K

Following: 104

Published Works: 2

About:

Hiiii, so I'm not very interesting and if you're even reading this, then thanks! I guess. Anyhoo, so like, Liam is pretty much the light of my life and we're going to get married at some point, you know? And you're all invited to the wedding. I'll be the bridge, since he's too muscular to fit in a dress while I'm pretty much a twig and stuff.

Yeah, so I'm a guy meaning there's something dangling between my legs. Sometimes that thing is hard, mainly when Liam talks. Or sings. or Breaths. I'm gay. 

What a nice way to come out.

Shipping da phan <3 Dil is their love child, am I right? I'm so right.

Whoever's reading this still is probably wondering what music I listen to? No? Oh well, I'll say them anyways bitches :)

>> Green Day, All Time Low, 1D (obvi), Sleeping with Sirens, Paramore, Blink-182, Panic! at the Disco, Bring Me the Horizon, Linkin Park, Fall out Boy, Nickelback, Skillet, Jimmy Eat world, and a bajillion more, cause music is life. Oh, and I have a small, secret liking for Hunter Hayes, but no one needs to know that...

>> I like Fault in Our Stars, but everyone likes that and I have a dickkkk, so that's not considered cool. But, fuck the haters and give them AID's. wassup to the no sex life! 

Would you believe me if I said I was 14? No? Whatever.

I'm awkward ._.

Do you like Pina Caladas? Did I spell that right? I ask a lot of questions? Do I notice? Not really?

Bye? 

:)

Ashton chuckled quietly, finding the guy really cute. He's stalking him at six in the morning. He seems to be very energetic and a happy go lucky person who listens to sad music. That's very contradicting, but Ashton's a depressed person who listens to joyful music, so not everyone is who they seem to be.

Noticing it was the last minute again, Ashton got up and changed into an All Time Low shirt then tugged on a black hoodie with skinny jeans. He looked in the mirror, doing his hair and grimaced at the mess in his room. He still needs to unpack, but it's only his first morning in the new house. He can just do it afterschool.

After getting somewhat ready, he went to the bathroom and rolled his eyes when seeing his mum sleeping on the couch for some odd reason. It was quiet, dark and he was the only one up like usual. As he brushed his teeth, he played the song that counted to two minutes; one thing.

Yeah, his mum got him a one direction toothbrush as a joke. He secretly likes it but acts as though he doesn't since he wants to seem somewhat normal. Not everyone is very accepting to a boy liking a boyband, he's just content with his mum being okay with it.

Once he was ready, he went to the bathroom and got his lunch that his mum packed. The thing is, he's not very hungry a lot because he's use to not eating. He does, however, eat lunch so his mum wouldn't be suspicious and so he wouldn't be wasting money and food. He eats lunch, but not dinner or breakfast which is better than not eating at all.

Finally, he got his phone and eabuds, shaking his mother up and mumbled,"I'm going to school."

"mmpf, okay, have a nice day," She said sleepily, going back to bed.

He huffed, shutting the door and locked it then stuck his earbuds in. On the way to his bus stop, he listened to The Summer Set 'Chelsea' and hummed along quietly. When he got to the stop, it was mainly a bunch of older classmen who never acknowledged him and all seemed like they would be jerks, cocky jocks or stuck up bitches.

Usually he tries not to judge, but there was a time two guys got in a fight and he awkwardly stood there acting as though it never happened.Either way, the bus soon came and he got on, listening to music the whole way while some stranger sat next to him who smelled of tuna.

Ashton hates tuna, so this was hell to him.

He glanced up as they got to the last stop, seeing his 'friend' get on and sit in the back. She was a girl who was smart, cute but doesn't actually attempt putting a decent effort in her image so she throws on clothes and puts her hair in a lazy bun. Sometimes he wonders why girls never at least try to look somewhat good when they have the looks for it. Especially when it wouldn't take long sometimes.

When he got to school, he waited outside for his friend, Sam. She walked out, tugging her kitten bookbag on and smiled at him. He just nodded, and the two walked in an awkward silence. They're known each other since year 6, but not close enough to where they're considered best friends or anything. They only hang out before school, since there's about a half an hour till it truly begins.

At the lunch table where they waited, Sam tossed her bag on the table as Ashton did the same and both went on their phones to kill the awkwardness. That was until same spoke up,"So, I have this project that I haven't even started and I'm probably going to end up failing."

"Yeah," Ashton laughed awkwardly, biting his lip. "What's it in...?"

He really didn't care, but he hated being rude. She rambled a bit, acting like her life will end cause 'she's not smart' yet gets straight A's and B's while Ashton gets D's and E's. That's actual stupidty, Sam is just acting life her world will end if she gets a B. Sure, her parents could be strict, but if you know your friend gets worse grades, then it's rude to bring up how 'terrible' a B is.

It wasn't long till Sam's boyfriend came; Chris. That's when the thirdwheel feeling began and Ashton quietly went on wattpad and began reading till first bell started. His day consists of having four long classes that change when it's the next day. Each day has different ones, but they go by A day and B day, so it just flips and sometimes he likes that but then he hates how long the classes are.

In lunch, he really loved it because you get to eat and not work. But, he feels alone. Sitting at a table with so-called friends who make him feel left out. Having to watch all the teens laugh and kiss, be together and talk about problems that really aren't that big of a deal in his mind. However, he then feels bad when saying that because to those people, it's the worst thing ever and he should respect that.

It's worse when your friend of 8 years sits with you, yet talks to everyone else. Sure, sometimes they acknowledge your presence when greeting you, but then they just talk to the other people and you go on your phone. Then someone points out suddenly,"Wow, you're always on your phone." 

Well yeah I'm on my phone, what the hell do you want me to do? Sit and wait till your done talking so I can three words in just so we can have a somewhat conversations i can tell you don't want to have? Ashton mentally sneered, but would always just shrug and continue reading.

His friend, Jake snorted,"Yeah, he's a tech freak sometimes."

"I'm not a tech freak, I'm reading," He retorted, it's like reading a book but with the names Harry and Louis in place of a different couple. Sometimes he thinks fanfiction is a lot more well written than actual books. Especially the smut, because it can get pretty damn graphic.

A girl laughed,"What? Fanfiction?"

"Yeah, sure," Ashton chuckled, casually locking his phone and took out a bag of chips. Then, like usual, they talked to each other and he mentally glared before going on his phone again.

-

Sadly, home is no different than school when it comes to loneliness. At dinner, his mum was at work along with his grandma and his step-dad left like usual without saying anything. He wasn't really surprised when leaving his room and walking into silence aside from his dog running around and playing with her toys.

He patted his leg, cooing,"C'mere, Sassy. C'mon baby."

She looked up, then went on the couch and he sighed sadly. Ashton went to the kitchen and got a plate that was made for him in the microwave. He glanced at the door to make sure his stepdad wouldn't walk in and quickly put the food in the pot, making sure it didn't look to different then put it in the sink to make it look like he ate.

Considering he was bored, Ashton went to his room and turned on the TV, seeing Friends was on. He shrugged, getting his laptop and looked through the comments since it's been a couple hours when he updated. He chuckled, replying to a few and then Luke suddenly popped in his mind. He hesitantly went to his messages and decided to talk to him.

Hazzaskitten707: Hi :D 

While waiting, he replied to a lot of his messages. Most consisted of a few that he somewhat talks to while others usually asked for a follow, read, vote, or translation. He huffed in annoyance, nicely trying to reply without sounding like a bitch then grinned when seeing Luke messaged back.

PayneInMyLow: oops <3 hello Ashton! How is my larry supporter doing on this fine evening?

Ashton chuckled, mentally scoffing at the 'fine evening', cause in his opinion it really wasn't fine. He didn't like pity though, so he acted like he was okay and really was since he was talking to a nice person.

HazzasKitten707: I'm good. How is the Liam lover doing?

PayneInMyLow: Fabulous, as usual. I saw that Liam is getting a beard again, dammit! He is looking fine as hell! If I had ovaries, they would be gone by now.

Hazzskitten707: I saw that too, he looks alright. I just don't do facial hair, I guess? It looks good on him though, I just didn't like it when it was during You & I, you know? It was a bit much, imagine kissing him and getting the prickles and hairy-ness all over your face. I pity Sophia XD

PayneInMyLow: Aww, I love sophiam! I mean, sometimes I get jelly, since I wanna marry him. But, I'm pretty sure he's straight and I'm way too underage :( so, as long as their okay and she treats my baby good than it's fine. I liked Danielle too, I kind of still miss payzer, it's like a first love you never forget and sometimes miss, you know?

Ashton mentally replied that he honestly didn't know. He has never dated anyone, he never kissed a person. Hell, he can't remember the last time he hugged someone. He was that unliked. Of course, he has those friends you talk to in school only because their better friends aren't in the class. But, it's like they don't wave to you in the hall even though you know they saw you.

He really wants to fall in love, though. He wants to have that bond where you can talk about everything no matter how many times the topic comes up. He wants to kiss someone, to know what it's like. He's written it so many times and he just wants to experience the fuzzy feelings, racing heart and lust you get when in love.

That'll never happen, sadly.

Hazzaskitten707: Yeah, haha. I honestly thought you would ship ziam XD I don't know why, though.

PayneInMyLow: I don't do 'side ships'. Like, I only believe in Larry. Sometimes I read them, but I can never see the ships actually being together, so it's kind of boring or I just don't get interested in them like with Larry. Ugh, and Narry is getting on my nerves sometimes :(

Hazzaskitten707: Aw, I think Narry's cute. Just...not really. I read some, but only cause I run out of bottom!Harry stories and try searching for the lack of Narry ones with him being submissive. But, I just hate how pretty much all the narry shippers hate us larry ones. Wtf, we do nothing wrong except live in our cave of gay sex and arguing over who tops. Why the hell do they hate us? we're not all aggressive and rude towards Elounor. Yeah, I don't particularly enjoy her getting in the way, but she's irrelevant.

PayneInMyLow: Yesss, you understand my pain (payne <3) ! Like, okay, whatever. Ship what you want, just why must you hate on us cause we ship larry? If I see someone ships Narry, I just go 'alright, cool. I ship larry' and they flip on me saying how fake it is! Excuse me bitch, I'm just trying to be nice and you caused ww3.

Ashton laughed quietly, smiling and snuggled into his bed. They talked a bit more, continuing on about the different ships but then they had to go to bed. He messaged a goodnight with a cute kiss, then laid down and suddenly heard shouting. He frowned, glancing up and noticed his mum came home in the past hour he was chatting with the Liam lover.

He heard his mother shout,"I had a twenty in my drawer and it's not there, of course I know you fucking took it, I'm not stupid!"

Ashton winced, cringing in on himself and glanced at his scarred wrist with ones about to fade. He picked at them, urging to cut but he was tired, sad and just wanted to sleep. He heard a door slam and sighed, turning to face the wall and slowly fell asleep, wishing to have someone that loved him. Someone who would hold him when he's sad and talk to him as they fall asleep together.


	3. Chapter 3

HazzasKitten707: I hate school :(

PayneInMyLow: I hate people :(

HazzasKitten707: I hate chocolate :(

PayneInMyLow: How can you even :o

Ashton chuckled quietly, walking through the hall with his phone in his hand, bookbag on his back. He avoided being touched by the disgusting, annoying strangers that filled the halls. Faces were familiar, only he wished they weren't since a lot of them were jerks.

He was on his way to Trigonometry and had a couple minutes since his classes were so close and he didn't like being early. That gives his teachers time to stare at him in disappointment for having such a bad grade. He'd rather barely make it on time and just be shamed for being late.

HazzasKitten707: I don't even know. I mean, I like chocolate ice cream and snickers or reeses. But, I hate chocolate cake, hersheys, Nutella and all that stuff. I'm a strange person. I even hate my food touching, it just feels wrong but my mum is all,'it goes in the same place, it doesn't matter'. So? That's like saying you can take the long way somewhere cause it doesn't matter, you're going to the same place.

PayneInMyLow: I don't like you anymore.

HazzasKitten707: *pouts* how dare you!

He turned down the hall, getting ready to enter his classroom. However, someone shoved into him and he winced as he stumbled back by the impact. When he steadied himself, he looked up and eyes met with the familiar color of dark brown eyes which belonged to Drake.

Drake was someone Ashton despised to know end. He doesn't hurt Ashton, at least not a lot. He mainly teases him about his grades, loneliness and makes fun of his looks a lot. It's not Ashton's fault he's at a tough age. His height is short, hair in a fringe giving him an 'emo' look and he's rather scrawny. But, he's only fifteen and is surely going to grown strong eventually. At least, he hopes he will.

"Aw, were you texting? I figured you wouldn't have friends, freak," Drake smirked, hearing the warning bell ring and shrugged. "Well, maybe we can walk together so I can make sure you don't get pushed over for being so invisible. You have a habit of disappearing in the background."

"Fuck off," Ashton grumbled, heading to class and frowned when seeing Drake following behind since he's in the same room. He ignored him, grabbing his phone and unlocked it, seeing Luke replied.

PayneInMyLow: Aww, I'm sowwwy . Don't be sad! We can talk about Larry sex if you want ;) I happen to really think Louis fucks Harry in the dressing room before a concert, and maybe that's why he's so happy and glowing like the sun. Who wouldn't after being wrecked by that sex god Mr.T?

Ashton held in a laugh, mentally nodding in agreement and blindly walked to his desk while replying and sat down. He made sure no one was reading his message from behind. That would be really awkward, just seeing someone message another person about two guys fucking.

HazzasKitten707: omg, yes! And I really love student/teacher shit. I don't know why, its just super fun and intense to read. Like, having them hook up on a desk and Louis' slamming into him from behind while holding a hand over his mouth so he's not screaming too loud. Cause, let's face it, Harry's a screamer XD

The final bell rang and he mentally groaned, telling Luke he would reply back later. He figures the boy probably had school as well unless it's different time zones. That's the downside of wattpad, some people happen to be sleeping when you're in school and it's annoying.

Class began and Ashton tried paying attention, he really did. But, it was hard to when all you can think about is Harry wearing those bright pink underwear that one concert when he's prancing around like a slut who's high, teasing Louis and every other person in the world, tongue stuck out like Miley.

As class went on, he tapped his finger, doing the problems even though he knew they were most likely wrong. He has a D- in math and right now, he didn't even care anymore. He basically gave up on school, all it does is lower his self-esteem and makes him feel more stupid than he already was.

It was no use in trying when you focus in class yet still can't get at least a C, that's the downside in life. Sometimes even when you try, you fail, so it's better to not try afterwards in his opinion. It'll only lead you to disappoint yourself more when you put so much effort into something only to not even pass.

In lunch, he sat with his 'friend' that only sits with him because he has no friends in their lunch bell either. Basically, the two sit alone at a table and stay on their phones the whole time while blindly eating their food. Since Luke was in class, he assumed, Ashton went on Wattpad and read some fanfiction to occupy himself consider he has no other friends to message or text.

When he went back to class, it continued and he had a staring contest with the clock. He made the hands count as blinks, so when it moved he won. Basically, the clock lost by a lot and Ashton felt proud even though he's an idiot who has no life and stooped so low as to making up his own game by himself.

Class ended and when he went to leave for Study Hall, he was called back by his teacher and frowned. He asked once the room was practically empty,"Yes sir?"

"Ashton, you're practically failing my class. I can see you have potential and if you don't boost your grade up you're going to end up failing and honestly think if you try hard enough you can pass," He said, showing Ashton his grade and it was the same as before.

He shrugged,"Yeah, well."

"I know school is tough, but you need to put more effort into your work. That's why I assigned you a tutor," He said, motioning over - oh god- Drake out of all people. Ashton scowled and his teacher assured,"I sense tension between the two of you. But, Drake is one of my best students and as much as I hate to say this, you're one of my worst. I want you guys to start working on tutoring on your own. And if Ashton improves, I'll boost your grade Drake."

They both reluctantly nodded and left the class. Ashton was glaring at the floor the whole time. Why Drake? Out of everyone it had to be him. Not even the adorable Asian girl in the back or the annoying, yet smart boy up front who smelled like Pizza all the time. Maybe even the strange, sweet girl that wore to much pink. But, he was stuck with Drake.

When they were out of the classroom, Ashton sighed and asked quietly,"Can we exchange numbers? I'd rather get this over with now."

He nodded, and they exchanged phones, putting each other's numbers in and handed them back. Ashton nodded at him goodbye, heading upstairs for his last class of the day. He went to the back of the class, going on his phone the whole time or mindlessly drew in his notebook, not having any homework. His mind was set on Luke though, wondering what he was doing at the moment.

-

On the bus ride back home, Ashton listened to Paramore and nodded to the music a bit. It was When It Rains and he happened to love the song a lot. It was one of his favorites by them, people seem to under-appreciate the beautiful song and it's not fair. However, every band or singer has that one song that people don't take the time to listen to. 

When he walked to his house, he saw his mum still asleep on the couch and rolled his eyes. The TV was on, puppy running around and looking as cute as ever. He went to the kitchen, grabbing a bowl of ice cream and yeah, he tries staying skinny but sometimes it doesn't go well and he gets mad at himself for being such a pig.

As he went to his room, he opened his laptop and turned on his TV, seeing Spongebob was on like usual. He kept the TV on low, going to Wattpad once his laptop loaded. As soon as he got there, he went to his messages and clicked on Luke's, seeing he replied.

PayneInMyLow: Dear god, Ashton. You're making me hard, wtf! I'm in class, this is awkward haha :P But you're so right, Harry is probably the loudest person ever when it comes down to doing the do. I can imagine them on the tour bus and Louis sneaks into his bunk, and they're fucking and Harry's moans are being muffled by Louis' hand so they don't wake the others and Niall is probably in the bunk underneath, with his eyes all wide and Zayn's across the them and they're secretly listening XD

Ashton laughed, blushing when realizing he did out loud and was so happy he's not the only person who thinks of these things. Sometimes he feels like a freak, and he really is. But, it's nice to not be the only freak around. He glanced at the TV, seeing Spongebob licking a chocolate bar and shook his head in amusement.

HazzasKitten707: Yesss, you're amazing! I can't believe you think of this too! I love fanfics where stuff like that happens. Or when...Harry wears panties...I don't know why, but that's hot to me? He wears them in real life, I swear. Like, he wore bright pink ones and even a thong, remember in x-factor?!

Luke took a while to reply, so Ashton ate some of his ice cream and went to typing an update for his stories. For a while, the two talked about those subjects and inbetween messaging, Ashton found time to write and watch LushLaws videos while eating and watching dumb Nickelodeon shows.

Somehow the two began discussing their favorite Larry stories. Ashton said his were Uniquely Perfect, Teachers Pet and Beautiful Submissive, cause submissive Harry is the bomb.com. Luke agreed with those, also adding Half A Heart, A Twist of Fate, The Jock and The Nerd. Thus, they talked about Mpregs, where a male gets pregnant AKA Harry Styles cause he's the bottomiest of all bottoms.

PayneInMyLow: I really like mpregs, I don't get why people find them weird considering they read about gay sex yet find a guy getting pregnant strange? I think it's kind of unfair that guys can't get pregnant. Sure, I wouldn't want to be, but girls have special bonds with their kids from holding them for 9 months and it would be cool for a guy to have that too.

HazzasKitten707: I just hate how people get so immature about it. I'm the dirtiest person ever, but how can someone read daddykinks yet flip when a boy has a kid? It's really not that strange or freaky. Dude, there's cannibalism in the world and fifteen year olds are freaking over a guy giving birth. There's c-sections, mainly girls are on here yet they forget that.

Suddenly his bedroom door opened and mum walked in yawning with her hair in a messy ponytail and pajamas on despite it being four in the afternoon,"Hey baby, you're home. How was school?"

"School?" He shrugged, waiting for Luke's message.

She grinned,"Good, I'm gonna get ready for work."

"Okay...by the way, I'm having a friend over to tutor me since I'm failing math," He said casually, trying to find bottom!Harry smut one-shots on ArchiveofOurOwn. He hates the website, but they have nice smut and that's where he goes for it. He doesn't read actually full length stories there. It's too complicated for him.

Instead of yelling like most parents, she nodded,"Alright, I'm taking a shower."

"Mhmm," He hummed, and she shut his door. 

He rolled his eyes, huffing a bit. Most kids would love for their parents to be so calm about their children failing a class. But, they don't realize it doesn't set goals for the kids. Now that their parents don't care, neither do they. They have no motivation in their lives and then they don't care.

Ashton grabbed his phone, going to his texts and the last one was from his grandma a few days ago from when he asked her to get gum from the store on her way from work. Literally, no one texts him first and if they do it's to ask what homework was and he never knows the answer.

He opened a new text, clicking Drake's contact and asked if they could study tomorrow or not. He says yes and that's it. So, Ashton now had a reason to be upset about tomorrow and it wasn't even because he had to get up at five thirty and go to school. He grumbled, but a smile formed on his face when seeing Luke messaged him and he didn't even realize it himself that the guy he doesn't know has been making him smile more than he normal does, and that's not a lot.


	4. Chapter 4

It was a reluctant moment in Ashton's life. He really didn't want Drake over for a number of reasons. One, because well, he just doesn't like him at all. Two, he hates math and knew they would argue over it. And lastly, he wasn't embarrassed of his room but more over the fact that Drake would see it and possibly tell everyone at school that it was a 'girl's room'.

Since he moved in a few days ago, he had his posters up and it wasn't a few. It was practically wallpaper, only the ceiling being white and he didn't care if that's weird. He had his idols looking over him. They were everywhere, and it made him feel content inside because they're the reasons why he's alive. When he want to hurt himself, he can see them and feel better inside.

Sometimes it worries him about how much he relies on people who didn't know he exists. But, then he thinks back to before he even knew who One Direction was and he was depressed for a year. Seeing as he lived in a hotel for three years, he only knew One Direction for a little over two. That gave him a solid year of wanting to die and he still does at times, but his goal is to meet the boys before he passes, and he needs to do that. It's basically his own expiration date.

There's also the fact that his family and home was embarrassing in general. Not only was he living in a bad neighborhood, apartment and home. But, you can hear his family talking in the living room, his bedroom was directly next to his parents and the furniture was embarrassing in general, being torn and not matching. Sounds dumb, but it makes them look trashy and careless.

Not to mention his mum walks around in ruggedy clothes despite her owning nice jeans and shirts. She just doesn't take the littlest effort to look decent. Even if she knew Ashton was having guests over, she doesn't care. Plus, his stepdad work stained shirts and jeans that were baggy, showing off his ripped boxers.

Ashton nearly whined when Drake texted he was there. After contemplating on acting like he wasn't home, Ashton reluctantly got up and went to the living room, seeing his mum was laying on the couch half-asleep despite it being almost four in the afternoon on a Saturday and stepdad smoking while playing video games.

He sighed, telling them while slipping on shoes,"Drake is here, m'gonna bring him up."

"Alright," His mum said, though paid attention to her phone.

Ashton frowned and went downstairs, the halls smelling of weed from his neighbors and hoped Drake wouldn't notice or at least not point it out. It was strange caring for his opinion, but when you hate or dislike someone, you want them to think you're amazing so they didn't have anything to hold against you.

When he got downstairs, he saw Drake leaning against a rather expensive car and typing on his phone. Ashton walked over, saying awkwardly,"Em, hey, you can come up now."

"Let's just get this over with," He grumbled, having a bag on his shoulder and shoved passed Ashton. 

Being the mature person he is, Ashton silently mocked Drake behind his back and glared at him with a pout on his face. He was so mature, the maturiest of them all. When they got upstairs, Drake leaned against the torn wall with a bored look and Ashton opened the door, letting him in.

Thankfully, his mum was in the shower and stepdad in the kitchen. Ashton led Drake to his room, hesitantly opening the door and blushed when Drake's eyes widened at the posters all over his room. The younger boy sheepishly closed his laptop and placed it on his dresser. He sat on his bed, motioning Drake in and the taller lad shut the door, slowly walking over next to Ashton and looked around the room with an awe expression.

Finally, he spoke up with a snort,"Whoa, and I thought they were gay, but you definitely passed them by a mile."

"Gay isn't an insult," Ashton grumbled, taking out his notebook and looked at him expectantly.

Drake shrugged,"Yeah, I know."

Ashton was taken by surprise, "Oh, I just thought-"

"That I was homophobic dickhead just cause I make fun of you? No, I may not be gay,but I don't care if you are. I just think you're an annoying, attention seeker who wastes his life away by obsessing over a band that doesn't even know you're alive, let alone care about you," He retorted, opening his notebook and didn't see the hurt expression on Ashton's face, tears prickling his eyes.

No, Ashton doesn't cry over stupid things and he's not a drama queen. But, when someone insults a thing or person who saved your life, it hurts like hell. Especially when they point out things you already know. Ashton understands that the boys don't know him personally, however he can tell they care about him. Maybe not him exactly, but they care about the fans and it was heartbreaking that on one understands how much they mean to him.

However, he tried not to let it get to him and took out a paper, letting Drake tutor him so the jerk can leave him alone. He was already sick of this, and it wasn't a one time thing. He's going to have to constantly see Drake one-on-one and that was going to make his life even more of a hell.

For a while it was okay, however Drake began playing his terrible music and Ashton was irritated because he was annoying him, repeatedly pointing out every mistake he made. Yeah, that's what a tutor does, but he could have at least been nice about it instead of basically calling him an idiot.

While Drake went over the worksheet to see what Ashton got wrong, the younger boy asked to break the silence,"So, um, how are you so good at math?"

"Did you think I was stupid when you first saw me? Don't judge a book by its cover. My mum is practically a drill Sargent when it comes to school. She didn't want her son being a drop-out or getting below a B," He grumbled, crossing out things so many times that Ashton can predict there's tons of red marks all over his paper.

He was so dumb.

A frown formed on his face when getting the paper back and he tugged at his fringe, blonde hair in frustration. Why can't he just understand this? He pays attention, does the work, yet it won't process in his brain. He's tired of feeling stupid, he wants to be smart but apparently he's not meant to be.

In the end, Drake left with an annoyed expression and Ashton felt so hopeless. No matter how much Drake tried helping, Ashton failed and couldn't get the information to work into his mind. He couldn't understand the information and is just a stupid, retarded idiot.

Tears welled up from anger, he literally felt worthless. If he's not passing school, he won't get into college and would fail with life in general. You need to get to college in order to find a job that even pays well enough to own a home. Without good grades, he's a failure.

Suddenly there was yelling from the kitchen that echoed into his room and he could hear his mum yelling at his stepdad about him stealing money again. Ashton held in a sob, frantically grabbing his wallet phone case which hid his blades and he hesitated before pressing the metal to his wrist, and that night he didn't fall asleep with a smile.

-

PayneInMyLow: No fucking way.

Hazzaskitten707: Seriously! I have all the seasons of Boy Meets World! I watch them all the time, they're the best and I'm trying to get all the Full House episodes.

PayneInMyLow: Eh, Boy Meets World is a lot better than Full House /:

Ashton literally gasped, blushing when a few old ladies stared at him in confusion. He was waiting to get a haircut, his grandma was getting hers done and he decided to join her. But, he's only getting a trim cause he really hates having short hair and never wants it again.

HazzasKitten707: I don't believe this, Full House is da bomb diggity! Like, Uncle Jesse can so fuck me in the ass whenever he wants and Stephanie is my religion. How can you even - like, I love BMW but full house has so much more relatable topics and isn't all about cory/topangas love life.

PayneInMyLow:Nope, nada. We're done talking about this. BMW for the win #ShawnNeedsToFuckMeAndIWillHaveHisGaybies. Oooh, but uncle Jesse reminds me of Zayn and I think they're related somehow :O 

Ashton frantically nodded, then face-palmed cause he needs to stop doing that. Everyone will think he's crazy and having a conversation with himself. He glanced at his grandma, seeing she was almost done and he's going after her, so he needed to hurry up and reply back.

HazzasKitten707: Ermigawd, yes Lukey! 

HazzasKitten707: *Luke...

PayneInMyLow: Lukey, seriously? You're adorable <3

A small blush formed on Ashton's cheeks and he really shouldn't take what Luke says seriously. He always sends hearts to people online and says I love you. Of course, he does mean the I love you part, but it's more like a friendly love. Hearts were different though, for some reason the little message made him smile more than he should.

He must look like a pedophile.

Suddenly his grandma was done and Ashton reluctantly put his phone away to message Luke later. He went over, seeing his grandma motioning to where she sat. The lady gave him a small smile, but eyes showed judgment when seeing his hair. He hates how people see his fringe and automatically assume he's emo or a punk kid.

It's even amusing sometimes, cause he listens to pretty much all pop aside from Sleeping with Sirens, My Chemical Romance and a few other bands that are more likely considered rock-pop or punk-pop. He even listens to country, just not as much. He does self harm and wear dark clothes, but that doesn't mean he's emo. Even if he is, emo guys are really hot in his opinion. 

Sometimes.

"So, are we getting a new hairstyle or just a trim?" She asked, glancing at him through the mirror. He lightly tugged at his sleeves, a habit to hide his scarred wrists.

Ashton told her quietly,"Just a littl trim, my fringe is getting in my eyes."

She nodded, not even bothering to have a conversation with him. It wasn't fair at all, usually people try holding a conversation when doing hair but of course she judged him right away and assumed the worst. Ashton didn't care, he doesn't like her either. She's too judgmental.

When she was done, his grandma smiled and ruffled his straightened hair. Ashton rolled his eyes, but smiled. She's the only one he actually loves living with when she's in a good mood. After she was done paying, he plugged in his earbuds and followed her to the bus stop. They have to take it since they don't have a car.

While waiting, he mentally face-palmed when forgetting about Luke. He quickly pulled out his phone just as the bus came and went on, paying for himself. He followed his grandma to a seat in the front, grimacing at the smell of sweat mixed with drugs. It was like hell taking the bus. However, he ignored it and read through the messages with a frown.

PayneInMyLow: I'm sorry, was that too forward? :o

PayneInMyLow: Are you creeped out? I didn't mean to! I was just joking, but I'm sure you're adorable...

PayneInMyLow: Fuck, I sound like an idiot! Please don't feel grossed out. I'm not a creep, I just like reading gay smut on line about two boys who are in the closet and love fucking each other after concerts and wearing lingerie sometimes cause I bet Harry loves wearing it and Louis loves seeing it.

PayneInMyLow: oh god, that is kind of creepy....I'm only 14 though! Which kind of makes it worst....please reply :( I lob u! <333

Ashton chuckled quietly, shaking his head in amusement. He quickly put on some Taylor Swift, 1989 album, and didn't really know how to reply. He almost fell out of his seat when the bus stopped, gripping the pole and sighed in annoyance before replying to Luke.

HazzasKitten707: It's fine, Lukey :) I was just getting a haircut. But, I completely agree. The whole fandom is full of creeps under the age of seventeen usually. But, it doesn't matter cause you and I (ayeeeeeeee that wasn't intentional, but like harry said, it just kind of happened) can be creepy together <3

PayneInMyLow: Yessss, I wish we could meet or something even if we just became friends. Like, I bet we'd be the bestest of friends and yeah. Are you in Australia?

HazzasKitten707: omg, yes! I'm in Melbourne :D

PayneInMyLow: :'( I'm in sydney, that's like, ten hours away!! 

A frown replaced Ashton's excited smile and he slumped in his seat. His grandma glanced at him and he gave her a quick smile before sighing sadly. He finally met someone who was just like him and they live a long ways away. It was practically hopeless and he felt sad all over again.

But, then Luke messaged him again.

PayneInMyLow: It's okay, we can work this out. We're friends now, we don't need to be all sad about not seeing each other cause we can keep in contact and talk about 1D all the time <3 I never had a friend who likes them, guys always hate them so at least I have you now :)

And that was all it took to make a smile appear on Ashton's sad face. It was relieving to know Luke cares about him as well. Wanting to be friends just as much as Ashton does. He wasn't just another internet friend, Ashton could feel this was something bigger. 

It was more than a little chat buddy on Wattpad who loved One Direction and shipped Larry. He feels like he can trust Luke and it's only been a little less than a week of constant messaging. Maybe they can be best friends, those who always hang out and talk to each other till 3AM.

Maybe even more than friends.


	5. Chapter 5

The first thing Ashton wakes up to in the morning is 'Alive' by One Direction. It was a good and bad chose to use the song, mainly because it's too loud and scares him, but it wakes him up well and makes it easy for him to stay awake. The sound of his heroes voices was a nice way to fall asleep and wake up to.

He sighed, stretching and saw Drake and Josh on his TV. He chuckled, seeing it was the Theatre Thug episode and rubbed his eyes sleepily. He grabbed his phone, having twenty minutes to laze around and just go on Wattpad. He smiled, seeing Liam tweeted about not being drunk when he obviously was. That little dork. 

His mini Liam isn't little, though.

Ashton went on his Wattpad, replying to some comments, read some new updates and saw he still had a few minutes left. He went on his messages, rolling his eyes at a few asking for translations. He was contemplating acting like he slept in so he could skip school, but knew that wouldn't work all the time.

So, instead he went to his and Luke's conversation, chuckling at the old ones. He really was having fun talking to Luke. He doesn't even know him personality, however he can tell they had a lot in common. Actually, they have barely anything in common aside from One Direction and Larry. They even have different favorites, but that works out in the end so they don't argue over them and can still fangirl over each boy.

HazzasKitten707: Mornninngggg Lucifer. Guess who it is...?

Seeing it was six in the morning, Ashton groaned and got up while waiting for a reply. He went to his dresser, changing into black skinny jeans, a flannel shirt and ruffled his unruly hair. He then put on his glasses, grimacing at his appearance but knew he didn't want to deal with contacts. He heard his phone beep and saw Luke replied.

PayneInMyLow: Mornninggggg Mrs. Lucifer. Who is it? :)

HazzasKitten707: It's the theatre thug! XD

PayneInMyLow: Shut up XD you're such a dork.

HazzasKitten707: I am not a whale's dingaling! 

PayneInMyLow: Yes you are, it's okay. You can be my whale dingaling. <333

HazzasKitten707: Awww, you're so romantic <33333

He rolled his eyes, going into the kitchen and saw his parents asleep on the couch. They were idiots, not having enough money to afford furniture in their room and now sleep there. So, he stayed quiet and packed up his lunch that he never really eats and got his water bottle from the fridge.

After getting everything ready, he went to the bathroom, brushed his teeth and washed his face. He then returned into his room, yawning and saw Luke replied. It was also time to go to the bus stop, and he really didn't want to go to school. There was a part of him wanting to skip, but knew it was wrong and he had no idea where he would go.

PayneInMyLow: I try, I try. Anyways, I'm listening to the new Fall out boy song. Okay, it's not new, but still! I'm gonna call it new. It's the centuries one, yeah I love it. A lot of people don't, though. They say it's too 'different'. Bitch please. Bands need to change up to keep the audience wanting more, you know? It's boring to stay the same.

HazzasKitten707: oooh, I love fall out boy! My favorite song is Sugar We're Goin Down! It's so catchy :3 even if it's hard to understand part of it. I listen to a lot of bands and can barely understand them 90% of the time. I'm so weird, but it's cause I love the beat and stuff.

Seeing it was time to go, he grabbed his bag and lunch, plugging in his earbuds. He flipped through his music, clicking on shuffle in his 'Depressing Songs' playlist then left after nudging his mum so she knew he was going. She mumbled something and he rolled his eyes, leaving the apartment.

On his way to the bus stop, he saw a man walking around and rushed off to the other teens so he wasn't alone. Apparently there was a murder suspect in his neighborhood and he really didn't want to be alone knowing that. Sometimes he wished his mum wouldn't tell him shit like that.

When he got to the bus stop, a few people were chatting with their friends. He wanted friends, but he also didn't. If you have friends, you need to keep up with them and make sure they're yours. Like, if you don't hang out with them a lot, they will find someone better and leave you for them. He doesn't want to deal with that, so he's staying on his own.

PayneInMyLow: I gotcha, babe. I gotcha. Who are your favorite singers?

HazzasKitten707: If I told you, I would pass the character limit, tbh.

PayneInMyLow: Point taken, top 5? :)

HazzasKitten707: Only 5?? :( 

PayneInMyLow: Fine, gosh you greedy little butt. Top 10, and not one direction. Cause they're obviously number 1. No one can beat them, no one! 

Ashton let out a small giggle, receiving a strange look from a few people. He blushed, and the bus came. When he got on, he tried thinking of a few people. It's really hard limiting your favorite singers and bands. That's like asking what your favorite movie is. Cause, it changes so much and you never know. However, he figured it out.

HazzasKitten707: Kay. Besides one direction. It's Paramore, Avril Lavigne, All Time Low, The Summer Set, Ariana Grande, Justin Bieber, Sleeping with Sirens, Green Day, Nickelback, and...gahhhh. Frustrations. You give me frustrations! (D&J oooh) um. I guess I would say Taylor Swift? Wow, my music taste is everywhere.

PayneInMyLow: It really is. And eh, I don't listen to most of those :( 

HazzasKitten707: Yet you listen to one direction? XD

PayneInMyLow: They are my exception. (youuu areee the onlyyy exception!)

HazzasKitten707: fine Mr.Im2Kool4Pop who do you like? -.-

PayneInMyLow: It's not cause it's pop, I listen to the radio a lot. I guess I like metal more though. Like, I listen to pop when it's on the radio, but I don't keep CD's of Taylor or download Ariana.

HazzasKitten707: Whatevs. Bitch swerve. Who's your top 10?

PayneInMyLow: you did not just swerve me, ho. But, my top ten are Linkin Park, Bring me the horizon, sleeping with sirens, all time low, green day, blink-182, pierce the veil, skillet, jimmy eat world, black veil brides, asking alexandria. I'm gonna add my chemical romance, even though that's eleven, cause I can.

Ashton's eyes widened, looking over the band names. He cringed. Honestly, he doesn't hate metal or rock, considering Green Day is rock. But, he hates when they scream. He may sound like a baby, but it creeps him out and he's looked up the lyrics to songs by a couple of those bands. They're very good, however they would sound better if he could actually understand what they were saying.

HazzasKitten707: Ooooh....kay.

PayneInMyLow: ):

HazzasKitten707: c:

PayneInMyLow: Why you say dat?

HazzasKitten707: That's very hardcore for a fourteen year old. I didn't know you actually loved metal that much.

PayneInMyLow: Most of those weren't even metal. They're considered 'post-hardcore' or whatever. Fuck that shit, I'll call them metal anyways. There's way too many genres of music now and days, can't we stick to the main ones like country, hip-hop, jazz, pop, and metal and rock? Ughhh.

HazzasKitten707: Totes. I totes agree. Like, omg, what is up wit dis?

PayneInMyLow: Idek, babes. Idek. Like, what is, like, all this? Like, I can't even. Like.

A smile formed on Ashton's face. He sighed when the bus pulled into school rolling his eyes. He got up and almost tripped on his way off the bus but acted like he didn't. A look of disbelief crossed his face when seeing his friend Sarah left him alone, talking to her other friend, Hannah. 

He mumbled under his breath, putting on a fake smile when walking over to them. Sarah glanced at him and then back at Hannah, the two stopped talking right when he made his way over. He felt awkward, not sure if he should even hang out with them or leave them on their own. But, he didn't want to be alone.

All three of them walked into the school, going to the cafeteria until school started. When they got to the cafeteria, Ashton sat down while Hannah and Sarah chatted together. He acted like it didn't bother him, cause honestly, it didn't. They have more in common than he does, but he's so alone and willing to be friends with anyone despite not having the same interests. So, he went back to talking to Luke.

HazzasKitten707: Hehe, you're so weird :3 So, I have a challenge for you.

PayneInMyLow: And what challenge is that? :D

HazzasKitten707: Name the boys in order of who you like more to least. 

PayneInMyLow: how can you even - 

HazzasKitten707: Do it!!! Just doooo ittttt! :) the last one doesn't mean you don't like them, it just means you like them the least. Just, if you had to choose who you fucked/who fucked you then what order would you want it to be in. We'll put it that way, kay? So, list away!

PayneInMyLow: You are so fucking cruel, Ashton. Okay, obviously Liam is my top babe. Then...Niall? Then Louis, then Zayn, then Harry. :( But. I love Harry! Why are you doing this to me, Ashy?

HazzasKitten707: How can you put Harry last??? You bitch!

PayneInMyLow: I didn't mean to! He's perfect, I love him, I promise D': just kill me now. Just do it.

HazzasKitten707: Whatevs, biatch. Swerve, swaggy swag. 

PayneInMyLow: Are you high? Anyways, you gotta list now. I went through the payne and now you do too.

HazzasKitten707: Things I see ; what you did there. But, Harry is my life so he is first. Um, then Liam, then Louis, then Niall, then Zayn.

PayneInMyLow: Why is zayn last?

HazzasKitten707: Why is Harry last? Huh?!

"Why are you typing so much?" Sarah's voice made Ashton jump, and she looked at him with a raised eyebrow. Hannah was staring too along with Sarah's boyfriend and Ashton blushed like crazy.

He cleared his throat, shrugging,"I'm talking to my mum."

"Okay," Hannah snorted, shaking her head. "I don't even believe you. I bet you're reading fanfiction like always."

Ashton frowned, but ignored them. He really hated when people pointed that out. So what if he reads fanfiction or writes them? It had nothing to do with them. It actually helps him with his writing and he learns a lot of new vocabulary. It makes him smarter sometimes, helps him accept people more and sometimes helps with life decisions.

That sounds dumb, however it's like reading a regular book that's not published and they replace characters with the boy's looks and sometimes personality. He feels so judged, lowered in life and insulted when they say that. But, he can't force them to except his weird interests. Just like he can't always except theirs.

-

It was in math class when it all went down hill for Ashton.

At first he was doing his normal blank stare look at the screen. He wrote down what was written, he tried listening but of course that didn't happen. He even attempted doing the problems that Drake was trying to teach him. It didn't work, though. He forgot everything and the notes he wrote were confusing to him.

That's when he noticed people looking at him. A few guys were snickering, some pointing and others whispering about him since he heard his name. He shifted uncomfortably, trying to ignore it. It was hard to ignore it though. Especially when he kept hearing his name every now and again.

When they were put in groups to work on a few problems together, he was put with a couple guys and a girl. He frowned, going over to them and awkwardly sat down with a small smile. However, he only received amused looks and noticed how they were eyeing him and shaking their heads in disbelief.

"What?" Ashton asked in confusion, taking out a paper.

The guy snorted,"Nothing. You just seem like the type to love a gay group."

"Typical queer," The other added, raising an eyebrow at him.

Ashton's heart dropped, and he stuttered out,"W-What do you mean?"

He recognized one of the guy's as Damien's friend, Tyler. And he explained with a judgmental expression,"You like One Direction, huh? At least, that's what Damien said. He also told us about your pink room and gay little posters. Are you sure you're not a girl, freak? Cause, that's a little creepy for a guy to be so infatuated with those five faggots."

"Does it matter if they're gay? And don't say faggot," Ashton grumbled, blushing when the girl chuckled at him. She was obviously a bitch, he commented to himself.

Tyler rolled his eyes,"Of course you'd defend them. How obsessive, I bet you even have their underwear."

"They don't even have underwear for them," Ashton said, glancing down when they laughed at him. He slouched in his seat, seeing the three now ignored him and continued working on the problem. 

It was finally out. Everyone probably knows he likes them now. That's not the problem, he never hid it, but not everyone knew and he didn't want to be labeled as the 'gay guy who's obsessed with One Direction'. It wasn't any of their business, and now he's getting teased for loving them.

For the rest of class, he stayed quiet and ignored how the guys were looking at him with little smirks. He didn't pay them any mind, trying to act like what they said didn't hurt him. Because, it didn't. He is obsessed, they are gay (two are), and he will always defend his idols that saved his life.

But, when he came back from taking up his paper. He opened his binder and eyes widened when seeing what was written inside. A laugh was heard and he glanced up, seeing Drake looking at him with a smug smile. The paper had a stick figure that must be Ashton and he read it to himself,'One Direction Gives me an Erectio-

"What the hell?" Ashton said in disbelief, glaring at Drake. He crumpled the paper, tossing it in the trash with a blush on his face that couldn't be hidden.

Drake laughed,"Well, it's true, isn't it?"

"Don't hide it, faggot," Tyler said, just as the bell rang.

Shockingly, Drake elbowed Tyler and sneered,"Too far, mate. Don't say that, it's disgusting."

"Aw, defending the little queer?" Tyler teased, and Ashton didn't even bother to listen to the rest. 

He quickly left the classroom, noticing a few people were staring at him and mainly guys laughed. He didn't get it. Why does it matter if he likes a band? It's music, and music should be appreciated or at least respected. They worked hard to get where they are, so they shouldn't be made fun of and especially not the fans.

When he got to study hall, he took out his phone and sat his binder down to make it look like he's working. His teacher doesn't care if you're on your phone, he just wants you to be quiet. So, he took it out and quickly tried to find Luke's messages. He saw a few guys who are friends with Drake walking in and they chuckled when seeing Ashton.

HazzasKitten707: Lukey :(

Thankfully, it didn't take much for Luke to respond. He must be in lunch, Ashton doesn't know his schedule, so he wasn't a hundred percent positive.

PayneInMyLow: Why the sad face? D:

HazzasKitten707: Do you get made fun of for being a guy and liking 1D? /: Cause, a few people found out and now they're making fun of me...

It was hard for him to admit, he wasn't one to talk about his problems. He felt like it was causing more problems for the person he was talking to or they would be annoyed of him. But, he trusted Luke and figured they were close enough and able to help each other out. It's been a couple weeks since they talked and they chat everyday, so that's pretty close.

PayneInMyLow: Yeah, sometimes. I guess it's part of the package of being a guy directioner. Or any directioner actually. Lots of girls get made fun of too, it sucks. I'm sorry, love 3 

The petname caught Ashton off guard, his heart beating somewhat faster and he didn't know how to take it. He calls Luke 'Lukey' but that's more of a nickname than a petname. Either way, he felt himself getting giddy over it, despite what was happening and now he was slightly happier. Was.

"Aw, someone's blushing? Did they see a One Direction nude?" A guy teased a few seats down, causing Ashton to frown once again and life just sucks.

He felt humiliated, to be honest. Completely humiliated and made fun of. He hated it so much and that's why he didn't want people to know. He wasn't a closeted directioner, he hates when people are because that's saying you're embarrassed to like the boys and don't respect them enough to let people at least know you like their music.

But, he wanted to stop being joked about liking them. He quickly got up, asking to go to the bathroom and on his way there, the halls were empty and he was relieved of that. Tears were gathering in his eyes and he didn't want to cry over something so dumb. But, he didn't have friends to defend him like he defends the boys and he didn't have a shoulder to cry on or a hand to hold. 

He didn't have anyone to stop him from taking out the razor hidden in his wallet phone case. He didn't have a person to vent to that wasn't on line or a friend that can tell him it didn't matter if he likes boybands. And really, he though as the blood seeped through his cuts, he wanted Luke here comfort him and hug him.

He just wanted a hug.


	6. Chapter 6

Usually, everyone has that one parent they love but can't hang around much. Typically it's the dad. Much like in Ashton's case where he wants to hang out with his dad more, misses him a lot and is basically abandoned. Having his parents separated and favorite one moving out. Promising to call and spend time together on the weekends, but it's all lies.

The first few times, it was fun and they would do cool stuff like go bowling, golfing and skating. Then he got older, his dad got girlfriends and the father-son time was more like his dad and girlfriend being on a date and Ashton being stuck with them as an awkward third wheel.

It wasn't that he didn't like the girlfriends, but he wanted to hang out with his dad and not have them be there. However, he wasn't that lucky and then when he got older, his dad basically abandoned him. The times he called were rare and very random, usually not happening unlike today.

It was Saturday, Ashton was doing his usual thing; nothing. He was writing, listening to music, eating, watching YouTube and watching TV all at the same time cause he's that awesome. He even fit in some messaging between people like Luke and a few other people that follow him and fangirl/boy with him.

But, then his phone rang (ringtone being the one direction on consisting of Harry saying,'hello, someone's calling you, answer your phone. Unless you don't like them.' and so on). He usually ignores it, but checked since it stopped his music. He saw it was his dad and eyebrows furrowed in a mixture of anger and frustration.

He hesitated before answering it and said,"Hello?"

"Hey Ashton, what's up?" His dad said, acting as though he didn't disappear for months and hasn't talked to him in a long time. Practically abandoning him and leaving him despite being within twenty minutes away.

A frowned formed on his face and he grumbled,"Nothing, why?"

"There's a soccer game on tomorrow and I know how much you love soccer." Ashton wanted to say he hates sports, but didn't want his dad suspicious. So he let him continue,"And I wasn't doing anything tomorrow, so I wanted to see if you wanted to come over and hang, you know? We can get some food and chill out, have father and son time like we use to."

Ashton nearly rolled his eyes. Like we use to. You mean before you fell off the face of the earth? It was so irritating, having his dad be so calm and neutral over this. He didn't know why it was a big deal, but it really annoyed him. He wanted to know why his dad didn't talk to him in months, but didn't want to ask.

He reluctantly agreed, having that awkward conversation involving his dad asking him about school and if he had a girlfriend yet. It was strange since Ashton never had an interesting in girls at all.Never once had he liked a girl and right now, Ashton wished he was out of the closet but knew his dad may not be okay with that.

It wasn't long till his dad hung up, probably only calling because he felt bad and didn't really want to spend time with Ashton. It hurts more when you love your dad more than your mum, but he doesn't care about you. His mum was a confusing person, he hates her but loves her more because it's his mum and he can't help it. But, sometimes she just gets on his nerves while other times she's very nice.

He grumbled, getting out his laptop and put in his password then went on Wattpad. He was so mad, mainly at himself cause maybe he should have messaged his dad first. However, as a parent his dad should at least worry about him sometimes. It's not like his mum will ever call his dad if something happens, after the divorce they basically hate each other.

The divorce was when he was three and he vaguely has an image of his parents in a physical fight and some furniture being thrown around, TV broken. But, he doesn't know exactly what happened. He never bothered asking his mum. He was always distant with her about their personal passed together before his stepdad appeared.

When he was on Wattpad, Ashton angrily went through his newsfeed to try and distract himself. He hated his life so much, he just wants to be happy and sometimes he wants to move in with his dad but he's sure his dad wouldn't care about him. And he went on his profile, typing on his message board.

"Father, father. Tell me, where have you been? It's been hell not having you here. I've been missing you so bad and you don't seem to care. When I got to sleep at night, you're not there. When I got to sleep at night, do you care?" - SWS 3

Ashton's eyes watered, looking up to avoid crying. It's so stupid. Many people have their parents in the army or some don't even have parents. Lots of people's have abandoned them or had them both die, yet here he is upset just cause his dad doesn't bother calling within a few months.

But, sometimes that's worse. At least their parents have an excuse and valid reason. Their parents are in war, they aren't allowed to call in a lot. But, his is just a few roads down and actually is able to see him if he wanted to. For those who have died, he can't even relate or compare it to that.

He sighed, getting up and went out into the living room seeing his mum and uncle's girlfriend talking. Her name is Toni, and it's a disgusting back story on how she met his mum. Basically, his mum was involved with drag queens who had her slip into the prostitute business when the family was desperate for money. They introduced her to Toni and well, tons of shit went down.

Ashton walked over, picking up Sassy, his little dog. The animal barked in a high pitched way, causing a small smile to form on Ashton's face at how cute she is. His mum looked at him with a grin,"You're finally out of your room!"

"My dad called." Her smile fell and turned into a grimace and he told her with a pout,"He wants to hang out this weekend, but I don't want to. Can you call him Friday and say I'm sick?"

An amused look formed on her face,"Honey, I don't think that's how it's gonna work. I thought you missed him, why would you want to cancel and get out of it?"

"I - I just do," He shrugged, tugging at his sleeves with a frown.

She shook her head,"Nope, if you want to cancel it the you tell him yourself. Now, we're having rice and chicken tonight, I'll call you when it's down."

Ashton rolled his eyes, going to the kitchen and grabbed a soda. He passed by his step dad and uncle who were taking very loudly and went to his room. He quickly went back online, only to see a few messages waiting to be replied to. He sighed, clicking them and saw one was from Luke.

PayneInMyLow: What's wrong? D: omfg, my larry friend is sad and I need to comfort you! 3

Ashton chuckled sadly, not sure if he should respond. He's not one to complain about his feelings and the fact that Luke is asking what's wrong makes him awkward. He regretted posting that message, it only causes people to worry or act like they care about him and he sometimes does things out of anger.

HazzasKitten707: Just daddy troubles (that can be taken two ways) :p

PayneInMyLow: lol, true. But seriously, are you okay? :( you can talk to me, you know? I'm you're friend, not just your fanboy buddy. We can talk about things that aren't 1D sometimes x

HazzasKitten707: I just hate talking about my life when people don't care /: I can practically feel people rolling their eyes when reading my message and picture they're blank face when they reply and act sympathetic. I don't want you to feel forced to ask if I'm okay when it doesn't really matter to you.

At first Luke didn't reply. So, Ashton figured he lost his only true friend. He sighed and replied to a few other messages, then started typing up a new chapters. But, then he went back online and saw a new message. It was once again from Luke and Ashton hesitantly clicked on it.

PayneInMyLow: Ashton, don't ever say this. You don't know how I feel. Unlike a lot of online friends I have, you're the one I care about the most. I know we've never met or even seen each other, but I trust you and you should trust me too. I don't just like you cause you're larry af and you love one direction. I like you cause you're nice and I can tell you are. I care about you, please trust me enough to talk to me :( x

A small blush formed on Ashton's cheeks, lump forming in his throat and he looked down. He didn't know what to say. No one has ever said this to him. Not even face to face. Everyone he knows seems so fake, like they don't actually care about him and it's very frustrating because he can't see Luke and tell if he's being honest. Anyone can type that and lie.

HazzasKitten707: I'm so sorry :( It's complicated, okay? I don't wanna sound like a baby or a whiny kid who has daddy issues. It's not even that big of a deal...it's just family troubles.

PayneInMyLow: if it's sad enough to make you post SWS trophy son lyrics, then it's not stupid. Tell me? <3

HazzasKitten707: I guess I just miss my dad? wow, a fifteen year old boy admitting that. Ha, how pathetic. He's literally only a couple streets down and doesn't bother calling me for a few months, then out of no where he decided 'let's hang out like manly men and watch soccer!' I don't know, it just makes me mad. I was always a 'daddy's boy' (that sounds dirty now that I'm older) when I was little and I kind of still am, so I miss him...but I can't just say that, he's my dad and it's weird to say that when I'm a teen guy.

PayneInMyLow: It's not weird. I hate when people say that. So what if you're a 15 year old guy? If he loves you and cares about you, I think you can tell him and he'll probably want to spend more time with you. My dad lives with me and we're pretty close cause a while ago, I told him that I hate not hanging out with him when I hang out with my mum all the time and he thought I was 'too old' and 'didn't want to hang out with you're old man'. But, now we're close :)

HazzasKitten707: I guess you're right. He asked to hang out this weekend and it made me feel like he felt as though he had to do it, you know? like as a parent, he knew he had to hang out with his son every once and a while but really doesn't want to.

PayneInMyLow: Yeah, but you need to hang out with him, okay? You have your chance, some people don't. Don't let your bond disappear cause you're afraid he doesn't care about you. He's making an effort, meet him halfway.

Ashton smiled sadly, shaking his head in disbelief.

HazzasKitten707: You're so smart for a fourteen year old, I admire that. <3

The heart was not intentional, but Luke always sends him little ones every once and a while. He clicked a new tab, going to YouTube and typed in 'lush' then clicked a recent video. He then took out his phone, hesitantly going to his dad's contact and sent him a quick text asking what time he would pick him up Saturday.

He was now a little excited to hang out with him. It's been so long since he's even seen his dad, let alone watched a soccer game and hung out like he did when he was thirteen and younger. Suddenly he saw another message and chuckled when seeing Luke asking what's he doing now.

HazzasKitten707: Just about to was Lushlaws :)

PayneInMyLow: whoa, whoa, whoa! You like Lush?! It's official, we're getting married.

Ashton let out a small giggle. Even if it was just a small joke, the words caused his heart to speed up and butterflies to fill his stomach.

HazzasKitten707: Okay, but only if Nick can be my bestman! ;D

PayneInMyLow: of course, I get Matt! Do you watch any other YouTubers?! I like Tyler Oakly, O2L, Phil and Dan, Joey, and a few others that would take to long to name.

HazzasKitten707: Hell yeah! I don't like Tyler much, but I love the ones you named along with Jenna Marbles :) I'm not that big of a YouTubers fan, but I do watch some people occasionally if they collab. 

PayneInMyLow: hey, just curious, but how did you know you were gay?

The question caught Ashton off guard, and he didn't know how to reply once again. It was a complicated response that made him wonder himself. He didn't really think about it, he just knew he was gay. It wasn't like he woke up one morning and knew, but it was always in there somewhere.

HazzasKitten707: I don't know, Lukey. /: at first I thought I was straight when I was like, really little cause that's what people expect and that's what I thought was normal. But, then I realized, even if girls are pretty, I can't see myself with them and I thought I was bisexual at first, but realization hit and I knew I was wrong when I watched a few videos on YouTube about people coming out and how they knew. What about you?

PayneInMyLow: Pretty much he same thing. But, then I had this girlfriend when I was 12 (weird, I know. It was those kiddy relationships) and we held hands and stuff, and I didn't like it. So, then I started questioning myself and I knew I was gay when seeing Liam payne and wanted to have his dingaling in my mouth....XD oops?

HazzasKitten707: hi ;)

PayneInMyLow: This is why I love you! <333 you're the oops to my hi.

HazzasKitten707: of course :D and you're the hi to my oops <3 I love you too!

And for some reason, Ashton felt like those words meant more than he meant for them to.


End file.
